Touch and die
love is fake
love is dry
many hearts are broken
so is mine
heart is aching
but front looks fine
face is smiling
but its all a lie
you said you love me
but i think you are blind
get lost asshole
get lost and cry
stop irritating me
and i'll say goodbye
Touch and die,
Sevene
Promise
I cant promise i would love you forever,
but i can promise
That i will love you as long as you love me.
Shower me with care and flowers,
take my hand and hold me tight,
Whisper sweet nothings and bring me light.
Fear not baby,
for i dont love you for your looks and riches,
but for the innoncent heart for me endlessly.
Alittle cute.. alittle careless..
So childlike yet so real..
Take it slow you said and i feel...
I know you meant it
and i believe you for it
That our love will last
as long as you love me..
and as long as i love you..
I promise.
Only yours,
Sevene
Hibernate
Feeling warm tears run the cheeks
I begin to realise that she is weak
How can she pick herself up?
When her soul has gone so sick
Attempts of revival went in vain
Yet she walked down the lonely lane
Realised that everything has changed
Nothing will ever stay the same
Not once that she felt her heart ached
Not twice helplessly she laid
Amendments needlessly made
Cause everything came forth too late
Her mind went into a daze
She felt her feelings fade
She made up her mind not to wait
So her heart began to hibernate
Yours truly,
Sevene
A Poem for P
Does it hurt so frequently these days?
When tears fall down your face.
Just like a dagger stab right into your heart,
And you feel like you are falling apart...
You pleaded to make it stop..
And blames it to be your fault.
Thinking of it haunts you so
And watching everything else unfolds..
All that laughter, jokes and such
But yet its just another smile that purposed as a facade.
Another veil to mask the ache
When you realised that everything is fake.
Yours truly,
-Sevene-
Thursday, October 25, 2007
feeling abit emo now.. kinda hate this kinda feeling... of insecurity and not knowing what the future lies..i mean.. geoff and i are doing fine.. things are going on well..but there is this girl who likes him.. and seems to be executing her moves quite aggressively.. which makes me feel insecure.. they have alot of contact as they are in the same hall.. the girl seems trying to get close to him.. so i quite sian.. yah lah.. i know its a bonus since he still likes me despite all these.. but i can sense that he seems to be enjoying all the attention that the girl is giving him.. which is.. hmmmpff.. maybe i feel insecure.. and i dunnoe how to get rid of the security.. cos i know if i keep keeping him to myself.. that will show that i am feeling insecure.. and also too pushy.. hahaa.. i hate that.. i wanna appear cool about it.. but of cos.. we are quite close already.. but i still dunoe what does it mean.. hai..
Reality Sucks Big Time
5:26 AM
Monday, October 15, 2007
11th oct 2007
went for mj dance today.. orh.. i just love to go for dance class.. something i will wonder if i am good enough to keep up with the standard.. but the urge to go and the passion will be over shadow the anxiety.. and everytime when i attend the class.. i enjoyed myself tremendously and learned much more things..
dancing..
the platform to express yourself through your body languages..
its not just movement of legs and hands..
or mere memorising of steps..
its about the energy in you waiting to overflow.. :)
i cant stop loving it..
when i got back to my hall.. i was expecting the grecos to come anytime.. since its about 12..
then geoffrey, brendan, shirleen, raj.. seok, and many many more people started to bombard my phone with birthday wishes.. so sweet.. there are also alot of people whom i din really keep in contact with.. they all remembered.. its so lovely when you know there are people who cares around you..
i guessed it when you treat people who sincerity.. that people will also want to treat you with the same attitude.. although there are also people around whom wun appreciate it.. but that doesnt mean you should stop trying.. cos one day.. they will also open up their hearts to you.. :)
well.. get going.. greco came and bang down my door.. not literally though... ha.. then sang birthday song to me.. then started dirtying my already not very clean room with chocolate cake.. and apparently decided to do mi some deco too.. hmm... i got smeared with cakes and stank of choco.. yummy though.. so yup. as usual.. the chocolate cake fighting and chasing around..
many people ran away.. back to their rooms.. but not as easy.. quite a few of us went around to their rooms and get them to ans this super "easy" question..
" are you greco"
we let them think.. dont rush into answer.. they can choose.. if they deny or say yes.. if they deny.. okay lorh.. dun worry.. we wun choco them.. but we will also ignore them and not include them in the group anymore.. then obviously.. this easy question has no choice at all..many of people just volunteered to get smear.. so funny lah..
well all was fun.. and good.. get down to cleaning the mess we made up.. and after which..we went to michelle's room for drinking session.. :P watched mich dancing around.. quite entertaining.. haha.. must slp early.. tmr going out with geoffrey.. :)
Reality Sucks Big Time
9:46 PM
Sunday, October 14, 2007
10 October 2007
today leon and i went down to the com hall to cheoro 4 eights of dance "because of you" for the hall dance people.. took about 1 hour to cheoro.. felt quite proud of ourselves.. hopefully got more of such chance to learn and build up the skills..then today.. got two new dancers joined us.. cheryl and john.. john is quite good.. he was a dancer in jc.. and went to ntu-mj for awhile.. year two.. wow.. hopefully he can lend us his expertise.. and on top of that.. both of them seems quite interested to continue in hall dance.. woohoo! my ankle stll hurts a little.. but can dance.. so i am quite glad.. that would mean that i can go for mj dance tmr.. wooohoo..:P
Reality Sucks Big Time
2:30 AM
6th October 2007
reached home at 3plus after that chalet.. and it was really really tiring..since i have been up the whole night last night.. at the chalet.. so reached home.. and pong..slp.. for about 2 hours.. and went to help out my dad with the preparation of the bbq.. my cousins..and aunt came.. as well as raj..bren n shirleen despite being so tired.. man.. half the time i was about to close my eyes.. felt really drained.. ate quite a bit.. theres sotong.. chicken wings.. chicken meat.. pork.. bee hoon.. drinks and stuffs.. my brother is like super high lah.. kept wanting to drink..quite funny.. then we played dai dee and chat.. my relatives gave mi ang bao.. hmm.. not bad.. chip in to the buy sevene a gucci fund.. lol..:P
when they went back.. i immediately slept.. supppppperrr tired.. slept like 11 hours..ZZZzz..
Reality Sucks Big Time
2:24 AM
Friday, October 12, 2007
These pictures are taken on 5th of October 2007
shirleen and marcus.. shirleen said she looks good in this.. hmmm.. desmond and geoffrey... desmond looks like takuya kimura right?
i like this picture.. :P
my guys~ wooohoo.. in jacuzzi.. haWttt..
venn diagram by shirleen.. idea to put on cake.. by me! haha.. first time you dun see a happy birthday on a cake yeah.. so applicable to us..
singing birthday song.. brendan.. me
i like this pic.. haha
i think i look like sulin in this picture.. sulin hor?
geoffrey..shirleen and marcus..:)
i think this is the best picture i taken that night.. i like it!:P
mi and my girlfriends.. me..eugena..joo..shirleen.. yummy~
my clubbing mates.. everyone is so "dressed down" standing in front of the jacuzzi.. still looking good :P
me and the birthday boy.. wearing shades.. brendan.. my baobei!
me.. geoffrey and his friends.. from the left: marcus..me..welly..geoffrey..
Reality Sucks Big Time
10:37 PM
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
5th oct 2007
the much awaited day finally arrived with a bang! firstly, our gang met at vivocity at 1pm.. attendance was huiwen..raj..joo..nana..bren..shirl..wilson.. bren and wil was wearing the num singlet when they came to fetch mi at the mrt lah..so cute lah.. look abit alike..then carried my big bags of speakers and alcohol to meet the rest at BK.. the rest of them look so different lah.. in our casual wears..beach wear.. so different from the times in clubbing.. and come to think of it.. its our first time ever meeting sooo early on a friday.. and why? its brendan's and weiling's birthday party.. and we are going out on a bang..
everyone was really getting hype up...excited and all.. everyon bought bags of clothes..bikini.. beach wear.. alcohol and getting geared up for the party... i guessed that becos this is the first ever party that we are so involved in it..
so we had our lunch at BK.. took turns to look after the stuffs.. while some of us went to buy food and clothes.. necessacities.. and cake.. one highlight.. shirl n i went to get our cake.. its gorgeous.. totally lovely.. we had that vienn diagram thingy which said.. booze.. club.. me.. "we tried".. oh my.. first time i dun see a happy birthday on a cake.. shirl's diagram.. my idea.. :P had a good laugh over it.. and took the tram to sentosa..
oh my.. i realised that many of them haven been to sentosa in a long long time.. lol.. raj dun even know what the tram is called now.. lol.. so cute.. n noob.. so.. we reached sentosa at about 3 plus.. checked in..
oh my.. the room was lovely.. though a little small.. the first floor had a king size bed while the second floor was the jacuzzi.. totally gorgeous.. we laid down our stuffs.. and started lining the alcohol on the ledge.. soooo much alcohol so that it can fill up the jacuzzi pool upstair.. who wanna get drunk and laid tonight? :P
anwyae. quickly changed into our sexy beach wear and headed towards the beach.. the sun was setting.. but nevertheless.. we top off our outside tops.. and laid on the beach enjoying the warmth from the sun.. and inhaling the saltiness of the sea..took lotsa of pictures.... the music from the speakers were rocking rnb n hip hop music.. cool..almost felt like clubbing.. haha.. but i am sure the night will be reserved with more joy n fun..
went back to the room.. wil..bren..and shirl n i.. wen to the swimming pool situated in the middle of the resort.. its big.. and there is a water fall feature which is about 9 stories high.. came with a slide.. and jacuzzi at the pool too.. swam alot.. enjoyed the cooling water against our skin..
at about 6 plus.. we went out to the room and went into the warm jacuzzi pool with everyone else.. my.. the warmth from the water is so welcoming.. since the room quite cool..especially when we are wet.. stayed in the pool and marvelled at the scenary- sun setting into the horizon across the sea.. how wonderful..
soon its time for us to change into our night outfit.. classy beach wear.. lol.. so yup.. we bathed and changed.. makeup and all.. eveyrone looked damn good.. i helped pek joo makeup and styled her hair.. and she looked operational ready.. :P winks!
soon.. guests started arriving.. mingled around..geoffrey and his friends came at around 9... geoffrey looks hot.. i like.. :P then we went to the rooftop to have our pizzas..had some drinks and chat..and of cos.. take pictures.. lovely scenary from there.. cool breeze was welcoming too..
after which.. my girlfriends also came.. they got me a guess bag.. lol.. like again.. but well.. not bad lah.. i like it.. :P
so mingled around more.. and later we went to check out cafe del mar.. its house music.. hmmm.. dun really like.. so we went back to the room.. geoff.. marcus..welly n i got into the jacuzzi and stayed there for a long long time.. drank our drinks and chat. and marcus got really high.. hmmm.. felt quite nice with geoff.. :)
soon desmond also came.. went into the pool and enjoyed the jacuzzi.. brought up some pizzas and food and drinks for them too.. geoff is like a pig lah.. munch munch.. lol..so cute.. soon after.. we changed back into our clothes and slacked around the room.. marcus got drunk i think.. erhmm.. so desmond n marcus.. n welly went back.. left me n geoff.. kelvin came onto the bed.. and we asked him.." are you okay?" he said. "no.." POnB.. he laid flat on the bed.. i went to get his shirt for him.. n he fell aslp after that.. yeah anywae.. its quite nice to lie on geoff's chest.. lol..:P
fell aslp.. and wokeup at about before 7.. let the rest of the girls slp on the bed.. was quite worried for brendan lah.. haiyo.. that guy.. dunoe how to take care of himself one lorh..hmm..
anywae...geoff and i went out to take a walk.. helped him massage abit. and chit chat.. then we decided to go swimming at the pool.. so changed and went.. wooohoo.. its relly nice.. and geoffrey refused to wet his hair..what a vain pok.... haha..had alot of fun time together with him.. talked about alot of things too.. :) so sweet..
anywae.. sun tan abit.. and then went out.. to look for them.. just nice.. they just wokeup.. so we just started to pack up abit and left the place.. went to vivocity to have lunch.. man.. i was soo hungry i could eat an elephant..
had like hokkien mee and laksa.. yum yum.. and then geoffrey and i went off.. to walk around abit at vivo..before going home.. we were holding hands all the time.. i asked him.." i tot we are not supposed to hold hands in town?" then he replied.." you wanna remind me isizt?" then i replied with a smirk.." no.."
then we continued holding hands.. lol..:P
Reality Sucks Big Time
1:08 AM
Sunday, October 07, 2007
thursday 4th october 2007
after jap class.. geoffrey and i went to eat at canteen and stayed at the library to study abit.. after while he went to his class.. while i stayed there.. then alvin came.. and we talked abit about tourmaline and his stuffs.. kinda sympathetize with him.. but well.. this kinda relationship.. there is no right or wrong ba.. its all about perspective.. then geoffrey came back.. then we went to grab a bite.. cos he said he is hungry.. then while eating.. i asked him how many people he is dating.. then he said two.. one of them is ashton.. then he told me that he did went out with her before.. then i was like.. orh.. okay lorh.. then you can ask her out sometime and stuffs mah..then yeah.. i became abit upset.. then just changed the topic.. and went back to the lib.. kinda ignore him abit.. then he can sense it ba.. then he asked mi why i seems abit upset.. but i just smiled and said nothing.. and i am fine.. but inside.. i was really hurting.. painful.. sighz.. almost gonna cry out..
then its about 4 plus already.. then we were supposed to go adm to pass my roomie the tickets she forgot to get.. so yeah. we went.. in his car.. then after passing the tickets.. my friend sheng.. is supposed to fetch me back home.. but geoff was saying he will send mi back.. and see doctor for my leg.. then i said its really fine.. i can go home with my friend.. and i can walk to see doc later.. cos its not that far.. but he kept insisting to send me back.. so i gave in.. but at that moment.. i really din want to take his ride back.. cos i was really feelin upset..and dying inside already.. but well..i just pretend i was okay..
so he sent me back... and went to see the chinese doctor.. but i was kinda glad that he was there with me.. cos the massage from the doc was really excruciating pain.. zzz..i almost died.. but he was there to hold my hand.. yup.. after which we went to have dinner together..
after dinner.. we came back.. and went to the pool side.. although it was nice lah.. but i kept thinking about what he said in the afternoon.. i became sad.. and emotional.. telling mi that he is dating ashton.. :(
then he sensed it.. so he told me that its becos he did date ashton for abit.. and that he was interested in her.. but at that point, she was attached.. so he din do anything.. and that they did went out for supper before and stuffs.. until i came into the picture... we did overlap abit.. and he did not want to lie about that to me.. so thats why he told mi that.. and he also had conflict with himself.. as much as he wants to treat me nice.. he is also scared that it will be very misleading.. cos he is not sure whether he can commit so fast and also because i am going overseas for 6months.. long distance is also quite difficult.. well.. i also felt the same.. dunnoe whether can commit now.. cos i dont understand what he is thinking.. so its quite painful having to keep guessing what he thinks..
but now that i understands its becos he is in conflict with himself, thats why he did the things he did.. and i told him.. dont go care about committment or what yet.. since we only just started dating.. just follow what your heart thinks and says.. not what your mind tell what is right or wrong.. so yeah.. he agree lah.. then he apologized for hurting me..
so yeah.. the air is cleared.. and yup.. he is treating me now much better.. :P
Reality Sucks Big Time
4:27 AM